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Domestic violence is a pattern of coercive behavior designed to exert power and control over a person in a relationship. This happens by using intimidation and fear tactics.
Domestic abuse affects many people in this country. Abuse may be physical or emotional and can affect partners who are straight or gay. Domestic abuse even affects teenagers. Domestic abuse is a serious matter and needs to be reported when it happens to you. Physical abuse, when you are in a relationship may include: shoving, pushing, slapping, pushing, hitting, punching or even hair pulling. Many times the person, who is abusing the victim, will not allow the victim to seek medical attention. Often, the abuser will try to get the victim to sympathize by saying that drugs or alcohol are the reason for the abuse. There is no excuse for abuse. Period. Let me repeat that, you can not expect the abuser to change. There are not excuses for domestic abuse.
If you have teenagers in your household, you need to educate them that domestic abuse is not okay. It is not acceptable to allow your boyfriend or girlfriend to hit you, yell at you or abuse you in any way. In young teens, something small like checking your text messages, may set their partner off. If your teens partner is controlling, this is a sign that your teen may need your help. You need to step in and make sure your teen understands what a healthy relationship looks and sounds like. Thankfully, there are now many resources that can help you out. You can even check with the school your teen attends to see if they have any domestic violence resources available at the school. If not, check with your local community. But find the help you need to help your child.
Interestingly, most abusers do not see themselves as abusers, but rather as victims. When asked, “Why did you abuse your wife?”. One husband convicted of domestic abuse said, “I wanted to control her just because I knew that I could”.
If you are someone you know is being abused, make sure to get help.